HALOWEEN/TZJ'S BIRTHDAY

i'm missing my bro damn badly now. want to cry.
reminds me of the time he was in the army. i called him 3 days after he booked in and cried.
ahhhh. i'm tearing already. how am i gonna survive......................

): ): ):

i sms-ed him to wish him happy birthday. then he thought we were gonna see each other in church tmrw. that made me damn sad la. i told him i had the combined training crap. and he thought it was today. no that's not why i'm sad. i'm sad 'cause i'm not even seeing him on his birthday. i haven't gotten him a gift either. oh crap. my tears are like free flow drinks at just acia now.

i hope i win tmrw. although there's really no chance at all. i wanna win to make myself feel better. feel like i didn't bloody waste my time there. instead of getting to meet my bro. after not seeing him for days.....

i just realised it's like 3 days also.. from the last time i saw him. just like that time when he booked in. i guess 3 days is the max i can tahan being away from my bro......

i'm being so dramatic right now. lame crap. he doesn't know i miss him so much. even though i told him. hai. i'm so jealous of boyuan and his sis going to watch a movie together. i never got to do that with my bro ): unless you wanna count watching all my jap dramas and movies at home...

ah. i don't feel a thing for the friendly match tmrw. although i know it will build up as i near hwa chong tmrw. right now, i'm too busy feeling depressed about not seeing my bro.

bet this blog post is sounding more incestuous <- is that the word?
whatever, i don't care. i love my bro. but i'm not into incest.

bye.

Argh

Less than 2 days to the damn combined training. I'm gonna have a panic attack!

D:

Aiya I'm feeling so stressed now.
Whatever, qiwen. You're better off dead.

Even more demoralised than yesterday

I'm freaking frustrated. I can't excel at judo. I can't excel at weiqi. Why the hell am I wasting my dad's money continuing both? I feel like crying right now. I freaking lost a 9 handicap game. Wtfffffreak. I want to console myself by saying it's 'cause that guy was strong. But hello. No matter how strong the person is, WHO THE HELL LOSES A 9 HANDICAP GAME. The only person I could beat was Tracy. She is getting stronger though. Bet the next time I play her I cannot win anymore. I'm really losing my will to carry on playing. Same for judo. It's so frustrating. I can't even do normal push ups? I'm such a loser. Even I can't stand myself. I should stop complaining about that bastard all the time as I'm equally as loser-ish at him.

My grades are sucky as well. Wow. I should get an award for being Lousiest In Everything. Yay.

Demoralising.

I GOT THROWNED BY SOMEONE WHO IS 44KG.
AWESOME MUCH. THERE'S NO NEED TO FIGHT ON SUNDAY.
SOMEONE GET ME A WHITE FLAG.

WTFREAK.

Dear parents,

One day this child of yours is gonna end up like your first. Carry on thinking you guys are not "making the same mistakes with me". Really. Go ahead and continue. I look forward to the day you finally realise that everything you guys teach are crap. Have fun with the nice promises I shall make with y'all from now onwards. And I'll have fun breaking all of them in future.
Aww. Love reflecting right? When you two grow old, you'll have lots of time to reflect on what lousy parents you two are. Too bad by then it'll be too late.
Yeah yeah. I'm grateful for all the stuff I have that other teenagers don't. Ha. All bought by money. So if y'all can get me all this, what is spending more to stop all the teasing and inferior feelings I have been getting since young? No. You rather spend money on a hopeless cause. Fine. Whatever.

Your pissed daughter,
Tqw

): what happened to my archives.
I changed my blogskin 'cause of my archives and it's still not around. HAI.


I have decided to forget you.
Forget we were ever that close.

blah bleah blah bleah

Everyone is updating their blog except me.
So here's a post to make me feel less "left out". HAHA WHY AM I SO LAME.

Went shopping with Jinju today. AHHHH. I wanna buy lotsa stuff but I already spent so much of my allowance before school even start............
So all I got today was a bag and a bandage skirt. Glad at least I settled a little of the formal wear shopping I have yet to do. I LOVE MY NEW BAG LOADS <3 although I feel it should be cheaper.

HAAAAA. I'M NOT EVEN DONE WITH 1/4 OF MY ROOM. ONLY 2 1/2 BOXES ARE FILLED. I'm too lazy laaaaaaaa. SHANE, I'M MOVING SO I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR ACTIVITIES ON SUNDAY.. SORRY.

I've been having lotsa breakouts these days. I was blaming the haze earlier.. but I realised it's my own fault. I haven't been eating my medication. Why the hell am I so forgetful. Everytime I finally remember I haven't eaten my medication, it's too late already. Like the time now.

Haha. The doc is gonna kill me tomorrow when she sees my skin condition. OHOH, RETAINERS! NEW RETAINERS TOMORROW! Ever since I dropped mine in the toilet bowl, I've been really worried about my teeth shifting back. YAY NEW ONES TMRW.

School's reopening next week. PT is resuming next week. I'm moving next week. Combined training's next week.
Greattttttttt........ NOT.

So NOT exciting to make new friends all over again.
So NOT exciting to embarrass my unfit self during PT again.
So NOT exciting to NOT live with my brother. (Don't ask me about this.)
So NOT exciting to compete when I can't even remember anything or throw anyone.

Such an eventful week ahead.
Can't wait :S

Rant again

Yay today's topic is on..

WHAT KINDA GUYS TURN ME OFF?

1. Guys who like attractive girls but diss the ones that don't look as good, even if they're nice. Especially when guys who are not attractive themselves do it. Not counting celebrities laaaaa.

2. Guys who are always looking for girls to like.

3. Guys who think girls are not as ______ (fill whatever you want in) as guys/boys.

4. Guys who like to brag.

5. Guys who love acting emo.

6. Guys who gossip like bitches.

7. Guys who talk non-stop in Mandarin to me. I can't understand.

8. Guys who are always thinking and talking dirty.

9. Guys who are egoistic and full of themselves.

10. Guys who are immature and insensitive.

Okay I don't feel like ranting anymore.
Bye!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hi. I'm back.
I wanted to add something in the post, but I totally forgot what was it. Oh well.

Camp

Omg. Jinju told me when she googled my name, my blog came up. Idk if that's good or bad. But I quickly got rid of my name. Haha.

Yesterday's training involved lots of running. Hai. I HATE RUNNING!!!! I wonder when I will stop feeling so shitty when I run. But oh well, the feeling after training is AWESOME.

I still can't stand that bastard. How? ):
Plus he keeps acting like Barney Stinson. What. The. Shit. Like stop it pls? Barney is funny, cute and awesome. You're.. NOT. I cannot take it when people try too hard to act like someone they cannot become. It's just pathetic.

Haiyo. Blogging about this is better than bitching right. Afterall, this is my online diary. I shall say whatever I'm thinking. Ok not everything but yeah.

Ok that's all for now. I'm feeling really bored.

Byeeeeee.

HUNGREHHHHHHHHH

Hello.
I'm really hungry and bored.
Took a 2 hour ride to school only to find the pool office empty. Security guard said they'll be back at 2. And guess what? I was supposed to get the forms approved by 2! Argh. I'm annoyed. But I need to save my energy instead of getting angry or else I'll faint from hunger.

Why did they call him efficient? I still don't get it after so long. Why don't they try working under him if he's so efficient eh? He texted me at 7 plus telling me what to do. I replied him at 9, asking where to find the sdar guy. No reply. Texted again at 11 plus I think. Still no reply. I'm sorry for being a noob but if you don't tell me where the sdar guy is, how am I supposed to get the job done?

I'm really bored right now. Feel like crying. I hate being in school alone! Idiot. I'm really on the verge of quitting.

ANNOYED IRRITATED PISSED OFF WHATEVER!

WHY IS HE SUCH AN ASSHOLE.

IDK IF HE KNOWS MY BLOG BUT I DON'T CARE. I NEEDA VENT SOMEWHERE! CAN'T VENT ON TWITTER 'CAUSE HE FOLLOWED ME. I WISH I PROTECTED MY TWEETS BEFORE HE COULD HAVE DONE SO. DAMMIT.

I HATE LAST MINUTE NOTICES. SERIOUSLY.

EARLIER, DION TOLD ME LAST MINUTE TO MEET IN SCHOOL TO CHOOSE TIMETABLE TOGETHER. NVM. I KNEW I COULDN'T MAKE IT. I WASN'T ANGRY.

BUT WHEN THAT ASSHOLE TEXTED ME, ASKING ME TO DO STUFF, I WAS STARTING TO GET IRRITATED.

FIRSTLY, WHAT THE HELL IS "Can you confirm the girls are going?"

WTS WTS WTS WTS. DID YOU EVEN STATE WHERE? NO RIGHT? I KNOW IT'S THE LOFT LA. BUT HELLO. THAT'S ONLY BECAUSE I HAPPEN TO BE TALKING ABOUT IT AND THINKING ABOUT IT. NOT BECAUSE I KNEW WHAT THE HELL YOU WANTED TO ASK ME.

AND THEN STILL ASK ME TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL DO THIS DO THAT BEFORE 2PM. WTH IS WRONG WITH YOU. SO LAST MIN. MY MOM ALREADY MADE IT CLEAR TO ME I GOTTA STAY HOME THESE 2 DAYS 'CAUSE I WON'T BE HOME FROM WED-FRI. WHY MUST YOU MAKE MY LIFE DIFFICULT?!

"How can i fill up the forms when everyone say see how?"

I UNDERSTAND YOUR DIFFICULTY. BUT IS IT MY FREAKING FAULT?! WHY DO I HAVE TO BE THE ONE TO BRING IT TO THE OFFICE TMRW AND GET SCOLDED FOR HANDING THEM IN LATE OR WHATEVER. UGH. EVERYONE SAY SEE HOW THEN FREAKING TELL THEM YOU GOTTA HAND IN THE FORMS AND YOU NEED THE ANSWER LA. MUST ACT LIKE GOOD GUY MEH? THEN SMS ME THIS KINDA LAST MIN STUFF.

I FEEL LIKE QUITTING THE COMM MANY TIMES BECAUSE OF YOU LA, SERIOUSLY. I DON'T WANNA WORK UNDER YOU. I WANT A DIFF POST.

ok feels good.

now for the good news.
I GOT IN TB22!
at first i couldn't get into that class because my connection was screwing around with me when it was time for me to choose my timetable. asshole.
i got into 26 but i continued spamming and when i saw 22 was available, i tried getting in. i failed the first few times. think i did something wrong. then when i saw the chance again, i pounced and I GOT IN. WOOOHOOOOOOOO!

so yeah man. i got into the same class 3 of my other classmates. yay.
hope next semester'll be awesome!

because i got in 22, i cooled down already.

wow if he reads this, i'm quite screwed. but seriously.. whatever. cannot take it anymore. sometimes i see his name, i get pissed already. i feel bad, but what to do?
i can be nice and help you with your problems and sympathise with you. but you are not the only one with problems. sometimes, quite often, YOU're my problem.

oh well.
life sucks.

byebye. hope i get to watch more FMA or lunch queen tonight~

Earlier post was by Zaniel.
Omg la. Trying to teach him maths. I feel so useless. Now Thiru is here. Good. SHARE THE STRESS MAN!
Ok bye.

Maths!!!!!!!!!

OUCH

Leg hurt more after training yesterday. I think it's thanks to that stupid circuit training. And my knees were grazed ytd as I ended up on my knees during every exercise. Dammit. Now I can't kneel, squat or stretch. Other leg starting to hurt too. Should I heed bro's advice?
Oh gosh. Falling asleep now.
Bye!

Results

On the bus to school right now. Freezing my ass off!!!

Checked my results while on the mrt earlier. Think it's lousy compared to my classmates. But I'm glad. At least I passed.
2 As
2 Bs
2 Cs

Thank God for my As seriously. They made up for my Cs. My GPA was 3.0833. Yeah it's not that good. But what can I expect when all I did was burn midnight oil and not prepare in advance? I didn't have the mood to study and stuff. My parents think I worked hard. I wonder if they know I struggled with myself....

I promise I'll get better grades next sem.
Goal: GPA 3.5 and above.

Bye. Time to train soon!