I have forgotten the feeling of being in love.
Pathetic.

Watched The Tourist today. With the 2 dudes.

Johnny Depp <3 <3 <3

Cute show.

He seemed to be in a good mood today. And I didn't really have to make small talk with him.

Could it be that.........

He read that post?

Nah, I don't think he remembers this link la hor..........

So yep, today was fun.

BYE.

Good day today.

Of course not the WHOLE day was good.

But it ended good.

So yeah.

Managed to forget about irritating assholes for 1 night.

HAIYA TMRW MEETING THAT BASTARD IN PREVIOUS POST FOR MOVIE.
wonder if it'll be awkward.

OH WELL.

I'M SCOLDING YOU HERE BECAUSE YOU USED TO LINK THIS URL.

BETTER SEE IT AND KNOW YOUR LIMITS, ASS.

OMG SHUDDUP WILL YOU.

SO DAMN ANNOYING.

I REALLY REALLY REALLY REGRET TELLING YOU.

BASTARD. WATCH OUT.

starting to find you DAMN annoying.

quit bugging me.

(:

Okay, I'm glad you're making an effort.

Really.

Because 80% of the time, it was just me talking so that there wouldn't be any awkward silence.

I think it's still gonna be the same when we meet up. Me talking and asking you questions since you're so quiet.

Maybe I should just keep quiet and see how it goes.

Proposal Daisakusen made me feel damn sad can.

I'M STILL FEELING SAD.

irritating. i should stop.

MERRY FREAKY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE.

ha.

You know what sucks?

Seeing a friend who used to be close with you becoming so sad/upset and you can't do anything about it because you are no longer close to the person.

It's not like I didn't try.

Why can't we talk like how we did 2 years ago?

suffocating.

need a breather.

never saw you that way.

guess i fail as a friend.

i'm sorry.

AWESOME DAY.

1. I COULD DO MIEC CT!

2. END OF COMMON TESTS!

3. BOUGHT LOTSA STUFF AT CONVERSE WAREHOUSE SALE. heh.

Everlast:

Sports bra

Socks

3 pairs of shoes

Shoe bag

3 pairs of shorts

Kappa:

Backpack

NOTHING FROM CONVERSE. HAHA.

4. (:

yay! if only everyday was this awesome.

HEADACHE SINCE PT.
COME HOME SO MUCH CRAP.
NOW HOW TO START ON WORK, YOU TELL ME.

I NEED TO. I DON'T WANNA BE A SLACKER DAMMIT.

FML TTM

OMG I FEEL LIKE SCOLDING THE F WORD DAMN BADLY RIGHT NOW.

BLOODY HELL. WHY AM I DRAGGED IN THIS OTHER MESS.
Y'ALL DON'T BE SO BO LIAO CAN OR NOT.
YOU THINK YOU VERY BIG SHOT IS IT. EVERYTHING IS ABOUT YOU AH.
WHY THE HELL WOULD I GET INVOLVED WHEN I ASKED YOU TO CHILL EARLIER.
GO TO HELL LA YOU OTHER BASTARD.
EXTRA HERE THERE EVERYWHERE. ROOT OF ALL PROBLEMS.
DON'T MAJE ME FREAKING WRITE A POEM ABOUT YOU.
IT'LL BE THE MOST VULGAR POEM EVER, TRUST ME.

GO AWAY. GO FAR FAR FAR AWAY. AND STAY THERE.

FML

I cannot take it already.
This night can't get any worse.
I was feeling all shitty about being sucha lousy friend.
Seeing that no one is like telling me what they really feel.

THEN IT HAPPENED.
ALWAYS HIM. BLOODY HELL.

I already gave up on him so long ago.
But my parents didn't. FINE.
Bro didn't move with us. FINE.
Now we need to find out you didn't repent?
Still have the damn bloody cheek to lie straight to our faces?

OKAY. FORGET IT. I DON'T WANNA BLOG ABOUT IT ANYMORE.
BYE. I NEED TO WRITE IN MY DIARY BUT I KNOW I WON'T. AS IF I DON'T HAVE MY PROJECTS AND STUFF TO DO.

actually i'm getting a lil irritated with you.
aiya, i'm irritated with everyone la ok.
i'm the most irritating of all.

sjbfkfbd

so.
i'm here to blog again.

my speech on IP MAN didn't go very well. haha. but i was so freaking glad it was over. and and. like i told everybody.. when i was quoting "Good kungfu does not depend on age or gender, but on how well you fight. Sound familiar?" Dion, Bennie and Bianca wanted to help me stall time by guessing all the wrong people haha. BUT A MALAY GUY SAID IP MAN BEFORE THEY COULD DO THAT. i felt relieved although my speech was "shortened" because of him. i felt bad for choosing ip man, i was afraid the non-chinese do not know him.

i think it's the lack of sleep these days. plus the fact that erm my "friend" is here.
i have been feeling real exhausted since this week started. sunday night - 3.30am monday - 2.30am tuesday - 1am wednesday - 3am. so today i wanted to sleep before 10.30 but i just realised it's already 10.29 -.- so 11pm it shall be.

met janelle today. omg miss her so damn much. we didn't get to catch up much, but i guess it's enough la. to last us for a few more weeks at most. HA I SOUND LES. whatever laaaaa. i'm straight and you know it! went shopping for mom's birthday present with her and OMG LA. everywhere i see things i wanna buy. for myself. not mom. i wanted to DIE. i have no money. sucks man. really. SUCKS!!! oh man i wanna cry. I WANNA GO TO THE FLEA ON SATURDAYYYYYYY.

oh yeah. that old woman who's teaching me microecons is really traumatizing me. i really want tuition. my mom asked me "do you want tuition for that?" she could tell i was gonna cry alr because i really suck at studies so i can't survive that old woman's lessons without any help.

tomorrow night's the harry potter screening. yay. free popcorn and candy floss. i can't wait to grow fat :/ i really think i exceeded 52 but i can't be bothered anymore. i really have no more motivation. idk if it's because these few days i'm feeling so damn "weak" that i can't be bothered with trying anymore. idk if what i'm typing right now makes sense but i am not gonna bother with it either.

every training i don't bring home new skills. i bring home new injuries -.-

ok i think i'm done ranting. i shall sleep.

oyasumi.

:/

why are you doing this to me.

everytime i decide not to care,
you pop up again from nowhere.

The Last Song

Took a break from slacking at the comp and watched some mio tv. Yeah slacking. I didn't feel like I got any work done unfortunately.
Anyway, watched The Last Song instead of Shaolin Girl. Ugh. There were no English subs for Shaolin Girl. Suckssssssss. Janelle told me The Last Song was good before. But I didn't have time to go to the cinema so I never got to watch it till just now. In the beginning, it was kinda boring. Miley Cyrus is kinda boring to watch when she's not Hannah Montana. Then the love story came about. Sweeeet. Okay I've seen sweeter ones. Whoa I think I'm falling asleep as i blog. AIYA ANYWAY THE MOVIE WAS DAMN SAD TOWARDS THE END AND I CRIED EVEN THOUGH I TRIED HARD TO CONTROL.

I'M REALLY DOZING OFF.
BYE

Dear diary

So..
I didn't throw too much of my face away on Sunday. Draw and a victory. But it's nothing to be proud of. It wasn't because I was strong. Oh well.

PT ON MONDAY WAS HELL. Omg I'm too lazy to type everything we did but I'm really proud to have survived man. Swimming after the combined training on Sunday really helped! I think my stamina improved a little. Although I still feel like dying whenever I have to run. So after PT, me and hazel were discussing about ry and jj's birthday thing. Tired as hell man and then God decided to let me rest more.... BIANCA TEXTED ME SAYING TEACHER HAD STOMACH FLU AND MY MORNING CLASS WAS CANCELLED. So yeah. Got to sleep more but of course, ever since poly started, I never got my full 8 hours of sleep.

OHOH AND I HAD AN ADVENTURE WITH KENNY -.- LOL WE SERIOUSLY HAVE SOME COMMUNICATION BARRIER.

Okay I realised I'm damn long-winded haha. I shall not blog so much crap.

Yesterday ry & jj's celebration went well. Except for the part where we thought that person was coming. Haiya. I upgrade him to person already. Cannot stand it. People always think I'm the only one that dislike him. OKAY LORH. Now I see him as a human ok.

AND TODAY.
MIEC tutorial...... HELL.
The teacher was seriously wthhhhh. There was no way we can answer her questions correctly!!! + I had a C for MAEC and I wasn't really paying attention during the first MIEC lecture, I couldn't answer almost everything. So embarrassing. Got humiliated for about an hour.

Ya lorh. That's about all. Today's training I realised why when I get thrown it's so painful and why when I throw it's so painful for them. I'm so sorry man!!! I didn't know. I better improve ): one of my contacts came out during randoori.I popped it back in quite fast. Without mirror. I'm improving in that area. Haaaaa.

I shall be a filial kid tmrw and go home straight after school to help out with chores. Wonder if the 'rents would let me sleep over at bro's. Hope so!!!

I'm done. Bye!

HALOWEEN/TZJ'S BIRTHDAY

i'm missing my bro damn badly now. want to cry.
reminds me of the time he was in the army. i called him 3 days after he booked in and cried.
ahhhh. i'm tearing already. how am i gonna survive......................

): ): ):

i sms-ed him to wish him happy birthday. then he thought we were gonna see each other in church tmrw. that made me damn sad la. i told him i had the combined training crap. and he thought it was today. no that's not why i'm sad. i'm sad 'cause i'm not even seeing him on his birthday. i haven't gotten him a gift either. oh crap. my tears are like free flow drinks at just acia now.

i hope i win tmrw. although there's really no chance at all. i wanna win to make myself feel better. feel like i didn't bloody waste my time there. instead of getting to meet my bro. after not seeing him for days.....

i just realised it's like 3 days also.. from the last time i saw him. just like that time when he booked in. i guess 3 days is the max i can tahan being away from my bro......

i'm being so dramatic right now. lame crap. he doesn't know i miss him so much. even though i told him. hai. i'm so jealous of boyuan and his sis going to watch a movie together. i never got to do that with my bro ): unless you wanna count watching all my jap dramas and movies at home...

ah. i don't feel a thing for the friendly match tmrw. although i know it will build up as i near hwa chong tmrw. right now, i'm too busy feeling depressed about not seeing my bro.

bet this blog post is sounding more incestuous <- is that the word?
whatever, i don't care. i love my bro. but i'm not into incest.

bye.

Argh

Less than 2 days to the damn combined training. I'm gonna have a panic attack!

D:

Aiya I'm feeling so stressed now.
Whatever, qiwen. You're better off dead.

Even more demoralised than yesterday

I'm freaking frustrated. I can't excel at judo. I can't excel at weiqi. Why the hell am I wasting my dad's money continuing both? I feel like crying right now. I freaking lost a 9 handicap game. Wtfffffreak. I want to console myself by saying it's 'cause that guy was strong. But hello. No matter how strong the person is, WHO THE HELL LOSES A 9 HANDICAP GAME. The only person I could beat was Tracy. She is getting stronger though. Bet the next time I play her I cannot win anymore. I'm really losing my will to carry on playing. Same for judo. It's so frustrating. I can't even do normal push ups? I'm such a loser. Even I can't stand myself. I should stop complaining about that bastard all the time as I'm equally as loser-ish at him.

My grades are sucky as well. Wow. I should get an award for being Lousiest In Everything. Yay.

Demoralising.

I GOT THROWNED BY SOMEONE WHO IS 44KG.
AWESOME MUCH. THERE'S NO NEED TO FIGHT ON SUNDAY.
SOMEONE GET ME A WHITE FLAG.

WTFREAK.

Dear parents,

One day this child of yours is gonna end up like your first. Carry on thinking you guys are not "making the same mistakes with me". Really. Go ahead and continue. I look forward to the day you finally realise that everything you guys teach are crap. Have fun with the nice promises I shall make with y'all from now onwards. And I'll have fun breaking all of them in future.
Aww. Love reflecting right? When you two grow old, you'll have lots of time to reflect on what lousy parents you two are. Too bad by then it'll be too late.
Yeah yeah. I'm grateful for all the stuff I have that other teenagers don't. Ha. All bought by money. So if y'all can get me all this, what is spending more to stop all the teasing and inferior feelings I have been getting since young? No. You rather spend money on a hopeless cause. Fine. Whatever.

Your pissed daughter,
Tqw

): what happened to my archives.
I changed my blogskin 'cause of my archives and it's still not around. HAI.


I have decided to forget you.
Forget we were ever that close.

blah bleah blah bleah

Everyone is updating their blog except me.
So here's a post to make me feel less "left out". HAHA WHY AM I SO LAME.

Went shopping with Jinju today. AHHHH. I wanna buy lotsa stuff but I already spent so much of my allowance before school even start............
So all I got today was a bag and a bandage skirt. Glad at least I settled a little of the formal wear shopping I have yet to do. I LOVE MY NEW BAG LOADS <3 although I feel it should be cheaper.

HAAAAA. I'M NOT EVEN DONE WITH 1/4 OF MY ROOM. ONLY 2 1/2 BOXES ARE FILLED. I'm too lazy laaaaaaaa. SHANE, I'M MOVING SO I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR ACTIVITIES ON SUNDAY.. SORRY.

I've been having lotsa breakouts these days. I was blaming the haze earlier.. but I realised it's my own fault. I haven't been eating my medication. Why the hell am I so forgetful. Everytime I finally remember I haven't eaten my medication, it's too late already. Like the time now.

Haha. The doc is gonna kill me tomorrow when she sees my skin condition. OHOH, RETAINERS! NEW RETAINERS TOMORROW! Ever since I dropped mine in the toilet bowl, I've been really worried about my teeth shifting back. YAY NEW ONES TMRW.

School's reopening next week. PT is resuming next week. I'm moving next week. Combined training's next week.
Greattttttttt........ NOT.

So NOT exciting to make new friends all over again.
So NOT exciting to embarrass my unfit self during PT again.
So NOT exciting to NOT live with my brother. (Don't ask me about this.)
So NOT exciting to compete when I can't even remember anything or throw anyone.

Such an eventful week ahead.
Can't wait :S

Rant again

Yay today's topic is on..

WHAT KINDA GUYS TURN ME OFF?

1. Guys who like attractive girls but diss the ones that don't look as good, even if they're nice. Especially when guys who are not attractive themselves do it. Not counting celebrities laaaaa.

2. Guys who are always looking for girls to like.

3. Guys who think girls are not as ______ (fill whatever you want in) as guys/boys.

4. Guys who like to brag.

5. Guys who love acting emo.

6. Guys who gossip like bitches.

7. Guys who talk non-stop in Mandarin to me. I can't understand.

8. Guys who are always thinking and talking dirty.

9. Guys who are egoistic and full of themselves.

10. Guys who are immature and insensitive.

Okay I don't feel like ranting anymore.
Bye!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hi. I'm back.
I wanted to add something in the post, but I totally forgot what was it. Oh well.

Camp

Omg. Jinju told me when she googled my name, my blog came up. Idk if that's good or bad. But I quickly got rid of my name. Haha.

Yesterday's training involved lots of running. Hai. I HATE RUNNING!!!! I wonder when I will stop feeling so shitty when I run. But oh well, the feeling after training is AWESOME.

I still can't stand that bastard. How? ):
Plus he keeps acting like Barney Stinson. What. The. Shit. Like stop it pls? Barney is funny, cute and awesome. You're.. NOT. I cannot take it when people try too hard to act like someone they cannot become. It's just pathetic.

Haiyo. Blogging about this is better than bitching right. Afterall, this is my online diary. I shall say whatever I'm thinking. Ok not everything but yeah.

Ok that's all for now. I'm feeling really bored.

Byeeeeee.

HUNGREHHHHHHHHH

Hello.
I'm really hungry and bored.
Took a 2 hour ride to school only to find the pool office empty. Security guard said they'll be back at 2. And guess what? I was supposed to get the forms approved by 2! Argh. I'm annoyed. But I need to save my energy instead of getting angry or else I'll faint from hunger.

Why did they call him efficient? I still don't get it after so long. Why don't they try working under him if he's so efficient eh? He texted me at 7 plus telling me what to do. I replied him at 9, asking where to find the sdar guy. No reply. Texted again at 11 plus I think. Still no reply. I'm sorry for being a noob but if you don't tell me where the sdar guy is, how am I supposed to get the job done?

I'm really bored right now. Feel like crying. I hate being in school alone! Idiot. I'm really on the verge of quitting.

ANNOYED IRRITATED PISSED OFF WHATEVER!

WHY IS HE SUCH AN ASSHOLE.

IDK IF HE KNOWS MY BLOG BUT I DON'T CARE. I NEEDA VENT SOMEWHERE! CAN'T VENT ON TWITTER 'CAUSE HE FOLLOWED ME. I WISH I PROTECTED MY TWEETS BEFORE HE COULD HAVE DONE SO. DAMMIT.

I HATE LAST MINUTE NOTICES. SERIOUSLY.

EARLIER, DION TOLD ME LAST MINUTE TO MEET IN SCHOOL TO CHOOSE TIMETABLE TOGETHER. NVM. I KNEW I COULDN'T MAKE IT. I WASN'T ANGRY.

BUT WHEN THAT ASSHOLE TEXTED ME, ASKING ME TO DO STUFF, I WAS STARTING TO GET IRRITATED.

FIRSTLY, WHAT THE HELL IS "Can you confirm the girls are going?"

WTS WTS WTS WTS. DID YOU EVEN STATE WHERE? NO RIGHT? I KNOW IT'S THE LOFT LA. BUT HELLO. THAT'S ONLY BECAUSE I HAPPEN TO BE TALKING ABOUT IT AND THINKING ABOUT IT. NOT BECAUSE I KNEW WHAT THE HELL YOU WANTED TO ASK ME.

AND THEN STILL ASK ME TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL DO THIS DO THAT BEFORE 2PM. WTH IS WRONG WITH YOU. SO LAST MIN. MY MOM ALREADY MADE IT CLEAR TO ME I GOTTA STAY HOME THESE 2 DAYS 'CAUSE I WON'T BE HOME FROM WED-FRI. WHY MUST YOU MAKE MY LIFE DIFFICULT?!

"How can i fill up the forms when everyone say see how?"

I UNDERSTAND YOUR DIFFICULTY. BUT IS IT MY FREAKING FAULT?! WHY DO I HAVE TO BE THE ONE TO BRING IT TO THE OFFICE TMRW AND GET SCOLDED FOR HANDING THEM IN LATE OR WHATEVER. UGH. EVERYONE SAY SEE HOW THEN FREAKING TELL THEM YOU GOTTA HAND IN THE FORMS AND YOU NEED THE ANSWER LA. MUST ACT LIKE GOOD GUY MEH? THEN SMS ME THIS KINDA LAST MIN STUFF.

I FEEL LIKE QUITTING THE COMM MANY TIMES BECAUSE OF YOU LA, SERIOUSLY. I DON'T WANNA WORK UNDER YOU. I WANT A DIFF POST.

ok feels good.

now for the good news.
I GOT IN TB22!
at first i couldn't get into that class because my connection was screwing around with me when it was time for me to choose my timetable. asshole.
i got into 26 but i continued spamming and when i saw 22 was available, i tried getting in. i failed the first few times. think i did something wrong. then when i saw the chance again, i pounced and I GOT IN. WOOOHOOOOOOOO!

so yeah man. i got into the same class 3 of my other classmates. yay.
hope next semester'll be awesome!

because i got in 22, i cooled down already.

wow if he reads this, i'm quite screwed. but seriously.. whatever. cannot take it anymore. sometimes i see his name, i get pissed already. i feel bad, but what to do?
i can be nice and help you with your problems and sympathise with you. but you are not the only one with problems. sometimes, quite often, YOU're my problem.

oh well.
life sucks.

byebye. hope i get to watch more FMA or lunch queen tonight~

Earlier post was by Zaniel.
Omg la. Trying to teach him maths. I feel so useless. Now Thiru is here. Good. SHARE THE STRESS MAN!
Ok bye.

Maths!!!!!!!!!

OUCH

Leg hurt more after training yesterday. I think it's thanks to that stupid circuit training. And my knees were grazed ytd as I ended up on my knees during every exercise. Dammit. Now I can't kneel, squat or stretch. Other leg starting to hurt too. Should I heed bro's advice?
Oh gosh. Falling asleep now.
Bye!

Results

On the bus to school right now. Freezing my ass off!!!

Checked my results while on the mrt earlier. Think it's lousy compared to my classmates. But I'm glad. At least I passed.
2 As
2 Bs
2 Cs

Thank God for my As seriously. They made up for my Cs. My GPA was 3.0833. Yeah it's not that good. But what can I expect when all I did was burn midnight oil and not prepare in advance? I didn't have the mood to study and stuff. My parents think I worked hard. I wonder if they know I struggled with myself....

I promise I'll get better grades next sem.
Goal: GPA 3.5 and above.

Bye. Time to train soon!

Prisoner

I

Want

To

Cry.

And

Die.

Mahjong session

I'm back here again.
Bored mannnnnnnnnnn.

At elton's house right now. The rest are playing mahjong. I'm so bored 'cause I don't even know how to play. And not that interested either.
Just finished watching THE ISLAND. Not bad. But yeah. I wanna watch jap shows. I didn't even get to watch my anime last night.
Ha. Last night. I wasn't pissed okay. But the fact that people think I'm pissed or making a big fuss outta my name is starting to irritate me.
When I started running last night, I told my bro about my leg. And he told me to go home straight away. Then he said I had to stop exercising for at least 3 months. So I went to see the Chinese sensei today and it was fine. Nothing serious. Praise the Lord. I don't have to stop training! I can't train today though, with my leg wrapped. Yeah, so my leg issue pulled my mood down. And I got so much crap from my sec school friends. I wasn't in the mood to joke around can. And they just had to gl me at that hour.
Maybe it's also 'cause of PMS.
Or maybe I'm just plain gl myself.

Whatever. I don't care.

Hi

HEH. I FINISHED YET ANOTHER DRAMA. I FEEL BAD. TONIGHT, I PROMISE, I'LL WATCH FMA!!!!

I WANT TO DRINK KOI REAL BAD. SOMEONE BUY FOR ME LEHHHHHH.

Yesterday's PT was tough. Idk why I couldn't breathe properly. Super short of breath. Like asthma or something. And hai. Embarrassing as usual. But the moment I decided to join judo.. Was the moment I chose to throw away my face. Of course there's no good side of me when I'm training. I'm so lousy at sports. Joining this kinda thing only leads to embarrassment. I really hope one day I get better and think it was all worth it.

I think the drama I just watched is really getting to me. Talking about dreams and getting better and blah blah. The show was quite cute although it was super exaggerated. Like who confesses his love in the middle of a Shogi match? I mean not to his opponent but yeah. Then towards the last few episodes, he asked his opponent for his daughter's hand in marriage. Lol. She was right beside some more. AIYA SO SWEET.

Okay whatever. Enough crapping. Gotta continue keeping laundry. Byeee!

I AM REALLY GETTING FATTER. I HAVE LAYERS. MANY MANY. EEEEEEEEEE. GROSS SHIT. WHY AM I NOT LOSING WEIGHT WHEN I GO FOR PT, JUDO AND RUN WITH BRO!!!!
So frustrating. I thought I would never diet and give up my favourite food just to lose weight. But now, I don't know anymore. I can't stand the sight of my flabby arms. I hate my layers of fats. Argh.
I just freaking fell asleep for 3 seconds. I'm sitting alone on some bench in city square mall. And I dozed off. Nice. Eyes still closing as I type all these. I wanna sleep ):

Okay I think time to call my mom and irritate her again, hurry them to come.

Fat

Hi.
I didn't go for training today. Even though my body isn't aching from PT yesterday. I'm hating myself right now. Daddy's birthday today. My parents are happy I'm not training?

Oh well. How to go for training without a partner.

Argh. I can't even get whatever's bugging me off my chest when I blog. Starting to miss my diary.....
Maybe I should start a private twitter or blog.

Ciao.

Waiting...

I started and finished a drama series yesterday. Awesome show. But it caused me to sleep at 3 plus. And I woke up at 6. Because of PT. KILL ME PLEASE. I have no energy. And I suck so much during PT. So I'm gonna suck more today. If that's even possible.
Sitting at the bus stop outside school now. Waiting for the 3 ladies. Gonna be late but I doubt there's punishment today? Seeing that one of them is the vice captain and she's leading PT today. Haha.

So tired and bored till I blogged.
Okay, bye. Back to stoning.

screwed up

Idk why my blogskin was screwed up.

So I spent a helluva time changing it.

I was so noob kay. The files weren't in html at first.

I decided not to link anyone.

A bit too ma fan. So sorry.

GOOOOOODNIGHT!

Blogging made easier

COOL. SEEMS LIKE I'M ACTUALLY KEEPING THE BLOG ALIVE. OH WAIT. RESURRECTING MORE LIKE IT.

I guess it's because these few days or maybe the past 2 weeks I have been feeling pretty idk, depressed? It's not like me to be this way. I have never let myself ........ Lose control?
This is getting real annoying, to be honest. I want to stop thinking about it already. I'm getting pissed at myself. Hate it. Maybe I'm a control freak. Need to have control over situations or else I'll go berserk.
I don't even know if what I'm saying is making sense. But I shall not care. Afterall, who's reading?

Still, I feel like making this blog private. Then maybe I can really vent.

Okay. Done with this post.
My noisy stomach is getting on my nerves too. Haha.

impulse to blog

okay, shane.
you're the only one still reading my blog la.
siao. haha.

hmm.. i guess i came back to this abandoned blog because i'm getting quite bored of using the laptop. there's nothing to do online. facebook is boring. twitter is fun but i can tweet on my phone and stuff. so there's really nothing much left to do when i switch on the comp.

went to WASEDA SHIBUYA HIGH SCHOOL on sunday. i feel damn bad for not going to church okay. but this event is like once a year (i think) and i get cca points :/
it was DAMN FUN. and SERIOUSLY CROWDED. PLUS THERE WERE AUTHENTIC JAP HOTTIES. heh. there were a few only la. HAHA.

ever since physical training for judo started, i feel like dying everyday. my legs are killing me. I HAD TO PRETEND TO WALK NORMALLY AT WASEDA 'CAUSE I'LL LOOK INSANE WALKING LIKE AN OLD HAG. very hard. i want to shout everytime i take a step up or down. HAHA. NOT EXAGGERATION OK. now this is what a blog is useful for: complaining.


it sucks. to not talk anymore. but well, imma boring person. and it's pretty normal to end up not talking. i thought this time it was different though, guess i was wrong.

OH YA. SOMEONE IS LIKE GETTING ON MY NERVES. I CANNOT STAND PEOPLE WHO DON'T TAKE STUFF SERIOUSLY. AS IN ONCE YOU MADE UP YOUR MIND, SEE IT THROUGH LA. WHY SO ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT EVERYTHING ELSE BUT THIS?

aiyo. the way i blog now is so sloppy. but i can't be bothered now leh. maybe my next post (which is when?) will be less sloppy.

AH. FEELS GOOD TO VENT. AFTER SO LONG. I'M LAZY TO START WRITING MY DIARY AGAIN. SO BLOG LORH. ANYWAY NO ONE READS IT, HEH. EXCEPT MAYBE, MAYBE ONLY, SHANE.

OK BYE.

i have the sudden urge to crap in this blog again, not that anyone still reads it. heh heh.

except maybe shane. the bo liao one who came up to me today and told me i haven't updated it since october or something. dude, it's august 31!!!

okay. i have TRUCKLOADS of stupid assignments due tonight, 2 quizzes to study for, many tutorials and a powerpoint presentation to complete!

hence, i shall waste no more time here.

bye. (shane, you better read this bo liao post.)